Does procrastination horrify you?
Happy Halloween! Here's a scary topic—not working on the thing you know you should be working on because you don't feel like it.
Scroll to the bottom for a few links you might be interested in.
I’m convinced everyone has experienced a level of procrastination so complicated and frustrating that you don’t even know who you are anymore. Or sometimes, you can’t stand yourself.
I tend to procrastinate, especially when I get stuck on something. I was deep in some major procrastination in the early few months of my book. I’d write, then stop. I’d tell myself, you’re doing everything wrong because you have to get the outline done first. No, just keep writing. Arrrgghhh. It’s like I had my own version of Gollum in my head, constantly contradicting myself and questioning every move.
My book needed events that would need to be turned into scenes and then chapters. Then (in theory) I’d have to piece these all together in a coherent way that makes sense with my timeline. Cue the head-exploding emoji.
Until I took an online class for structure, I basically Googled the shit out of this and didn’t find anything comprehensive (that was free) to help me understand it.
So, I delayed writing because I didn’t know what I was doing. It was confusing and I found myself walking away from my laptop to go vacuum. Or clean my toilet. Or go make a snack. Usually, the snack would win. I eat a lot of snacks.
Getting past the grey area
I swear you can’t be a writer without procrastinating. There are guides, videos, books, webinars, and online classes about how to stop being a lame-o and just write. Even the podcasts I follow go deep on this topic.
Much of the advice seems to be straightforward and fluffy—just write your gosh dang vomit draft. Edit later. Stop stalling. Set a schedule. Do it every day.
Excuses excuses
I have a lot. Many times, I just don’t have the brain power, as most of it was already spent in the early mornings banging out articles I’m paid to write. Or editing.
Truthfully, I probably work on my book three times a week. I’m trying to get into a daily habit.
My current source of motivation comes from the online writing class I’m taking which requires me to complete weekly homework before class on Thursdays. And it’s been incredibly helpful because I have a deadline and I’m forced to do it.
But when it comes to writing chapters on my own, it’s a different story. Like right now, I’m writing this Substack article when I could be working on my book.
Even when I do a solid half hour, 45 minutes, or *gasp* an entire hour of writing, I feel so good. I feel deserving of a walk, lunch, yoga, or a hike.
But on the days I don’t get any writing done, I feel the disappointment creep in. How are you ever going to get this done in a year, you know how fast a year goes. It’s always the same cycle of feeling overwhelmed, then slightly panicked and anxious.
And this is what sometimes ends up happening—I think about the scenes I need to write—in my head. As in, without writing it down. It’s like being hungry and thinking about a delicious sandwich that isn’t in front of you.
Finding a community of writers
So, this is a very long-winded way of saying that I want to (need to) be around other writers so we can put an end to procrastination. Er, at least when we’re in a room together.
I think I have 20,000-ish words written and maybe a community of writers will help me get to the finish line?
Above photo: I can’t even tell you how many times I grappled with watching Netflix on my projector or writing.
There are tons of writing groups on Facebook, NaNoWriMo, or sites like Meetup or Eventbrite.
There’s even silent writing groups on Zoom. I first heard of this on a writing podcast I follow (I think it was Qwerty—great podcast for aspiring memoir writers, BTW).
On the podcast, the author said she wouldn’t have been able to finish her book without these daily Zoom sessions. She’d log on, turn on her camera to say hi for a hot second, and then, cameras off and everyone writes furiously for two hours.
My mind was kind of blown.
I thought about joining but never did. I’m not sure why, I just never got around to it. Maybe I’m just more of an IRL kind of person. (IRL = in real life)
Write together
There’s something about the human psyche and our desire to be connected to others who share in the misery, the struggle, the challenge. We’re all in it together. Plus, writing can be pretty lonely.
There’s long been scientific evidence that points to the strongest predictor of a species’ brain size and direct correlation to the size of its social group. Basically, our brains are big so we can process all the socializing we do. (If this stuff interests you, read “Social: Why Our Brains Are Wired to Connect,” by Matthew Leiberman.)
“Social connections are as important to our survival and flourishing as the need for food, safety, and shelter.”—Atlantic
I went to Shut Up & Write
So last week, I took my big brain to a Shut Up & Write that I found on Meetup. I was giddy about attending a first-ever-since-the-pandemic writing sesh in Manoa.
There are so many reasons why I was ecstatic about this. I wanted to…
Get out of my damn apartment
Share my love of writing with others
Listen and learn something from the other writers
Not only did I meet some truly spectacular writers, but I banged out such amazing scenes for my memoir that I damn near floated to the ceiling.
The hour of writing was intense. I was in the flow. I did a double take when I looked at the clock and saw the entire hour had gone by. Wooooot. If I can write like this regularly, I can have my book done lickety split.
Perfect setup at Waioli Kitchen & Bake Shop
I have to give Ross a shout-out (and Nicole for organizing it here).
We met at Waioli, which is one of those places that makes you feel so lucky to live in Hawaii. Waioli serves delicious coffee, brunch, and baked goods. It could have passed for an elegant plantation home plopped in the middle of Jurassic Park.
I met the owner, Ross, who totally embodies the Aloha Spirit. We chatted for a few minutes and he asked what I was working on. I was a bit taken aback by his insightful questions about my book. He asked, “What’s in it for the reader?” Oh crap.
I definitely rambled, but I think I managed to give him a decent answer because smiled and looked satisfied.
Wrapping up the writing hour
After writing, we went around the room and discussed the books everyone was working on and what brought us to the meetup. It was a group of around 10 people. Some were published authors while others (like me) were hoping to publish their first book.
One gal said it was her very first time writing all of the thoughts she had in her head and wrote over 900 words. We applauded in delight. Another woman published 28 books!
Inevitably, the topic turned to procrastination. We talked about everything we do to avoid writing. We play video games, stare at the wall, clean, walk our dogs, yell at our husbands…
Shut Up & Write exceeded my expectations and I think it was a win for everyone. I have a feeling I’ll be seeing the same faces return week after week to escape the horror of procrastination and to get some writing done.
Helpful links
Shut Up & Write (This group isn’t just in Hawaii, they’re in many major cities in the U.S.)
NaNoWriMo.org (Join your local chapter and set your goal for the month!)
Writing with Aloha (Writers from Hawaii FB group)
The24hourroom.org (For the folks who need someone at any hour of the day.) Here is their calendar.
First Draft Weekly Writer’s Group: I joined this virtual writing group about a month ago. (I plan on doing an entire newsletter on this and will go more in-depth.) In a nutshell, it’s $35 a month to practice personal essay-style writing. We Zoom each week and are given writing prompts.
Eventbrite: Look for writing events or local book signings to connect with more writers in your area.