Tiny crisis, big lesson

It’s funny how certain situations can be so triggering.

(Quick note, unrelated to this post, if you want to get part two of ‘The biggest fight with my bro,’ it’s posted here.)

I needed to move my couch to the basement. Against my better judgment, I decided to do it myself.

Fail.

It was as if the couch was built with the exact design and measurements to one day get trapped on the top of my stairwell. 

What bugged me most was that it stayed like that for 12 hours.

Whenever I get myself into what I call tiny crises, I need to fix them right away because I’m a fixer.

But the sofa was wedged. There would be no solution for a while because no one was around to help. It was stuck, and so was I.

Instead of moving on with my morning and finishing my writing assignments, I started obsessing. One of the sofa’s legs was perfectly caught in the closet door at the top of the stairs. Why didn’t I just remove one of the legs before moving it? What a stupid mistake.

Maybe I could twist off one of the legs. Maybe I should call a handyman. Would anyone even come out? Or would I just get laughed at? Maybe I should call my neighbor—wait no, he’s at work. I think can just muscle it down the steps. I’m pretty strong for a woman. I pulled with all my strength to see if I could get that one leg unwedged.

Then, I felt a twinge in my lower back. Uh-oh. I knew this feeling, and it wasn’t good. I immediately went into the kitchen and gulped down four Advils. I don’t even know why I bothered trying to use blunt force. The sofa didn’t move an inch. There would be no more attempts, and now, I was annoyed at myself for my injury that would no doubt take weeks to fully heal.

With my lower back throbbing (or was I feeling the pain of defeat?), I hobbled up the stairs to get to my writing. I was done thinking about the stupid piece of furniture.

Much to my delight, the couch dilemma no longer took up brain energy. I thought, hey, this is kind of cool. Look at me, not caring or obsessing about this couch situation anymore. 

But what just happened here?

I realized I surrendered to a situation in which I was helpless and out of my control. After I did that, I cared less. I wasn’t as worried and anxious anymore.

I started thinking about how I could apply this tiny lesson to other parts of my life. I thought about moments when I sometimes lay awake in the wee hours of the morning. These are the things that need fixing:

• My book—When I’m not writing as frequently as I’d like. 

• My income as a freelance writer—the constant stress of needing more.

• My Substacks—Why am I not getting the level of engagement I want? 

• Wanting to do more podcasts—I’m still editing the same podcast… for over a month.

The sofa situation taught me to lean into uncertainty. I hope I can get better at recognizing the metaphorical couches in my life and know that everything will be just fine even if they stay stuck for a while.

When was the last time you leaned into uncertainty or loss of control? I’d love to hear about them.

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Epilogue

My neighbor came by after work, unscrewed two of the legs, and the couch slid down the steps—problem solved. 

Oh, one last tiny lesson I learned:

• Trust your first instinct. Especially If it says, Don’t move the couch by yourself.

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