Where the heck do you start when deciding you want to write a book? Here's what I did

The process is juuuuust a little overwhelming...

Photo by Daria Nepriakhina 🇺🇦 on Unsplash

I want to write a book. This was a conviction that hit me like a ton of bricks nearly six months ago. I would write my favorite genre—memoir. 

About five years ago, I started writing a memoir but gave up because I didn’t think I had a compelling enough story. I felt that it wouldn’t be interesting because I’m not famous or rich or some girl boss CEO of a thriving tech company. But then I thought, why not me? 

I thought about all of the memoirs I’ve read. I became addicted around 2017 when I first started traveling each month by myself and would listen to audiobooks. Since then, I’ve probably read hundreds of memoirs, from the wealthy and uber-successful to those enduring the death of a loved one, to everyday moms who had funny stories to share. 

I can’t even tell you how many times I’ve burst out loud laughing like a lunatic in public. I’ve cried and smiled and felt my soul being lifted. Others left me annoyed and anxious to just get to the end. No matter what, I devoured these stories to realize the cliche of everyone having a story to tell… is so true.  

Plus, my decade-long writing career, which started in entertainment (TV) and segued into tech, was just not as fulfilling for me anymore. I was ready to move on to authorship. 

So, where do you start? YouTube it, man.

After I made my decision to write a memoir, I was completely overwhelmed and lost. For real… where do you start when you want to write a book? 

I did what anyone would do—I turned to YouTube. I found a few authors who pivoted from writing to marketing their skills through online courses. Some of these folks offer free videos on YouTube, but they also have a course in which you have to pay in order to join. And it’s not cheap, y’all. So, I stuck to watching and learning from the free stuff. 

I also paid for Coursera writing classes and found Amy Bloom’s class to be useful. After her class, however, I canceled my subscription because I didn’t find the other writing classes all that helpful since they were mostly geared toward business writing.

If you’re planning on writing fiction and you don’t think the following applies to you, you’re wrong. A lot of what I’ve learned so far, for non-fiction vs. fiction is so similar. After I publish my memoir, I plan on writing fiction, so I figure it helps to explore fiction and learn as much as I can.  

Authors-turned-teachers to help new, wannabe authors like me

For memoirs specifically, these are the authors/experts that popped up and after watching their videos, are worth mentioning. I watched a lot of Joe and Wendy’s free YouTubes because I found them to be helpful for how to structure my book. 

Wendy Dale: I love Wendy! She’s the person behind Memoir Writing for Geniuses. I’m actually taking her memoir class right now, which runs for 8 weeks and has 6 students. (It’s the last class she will ever offer because she’s moving on to other projects, sadly. Stay tuned for a full review of her class and whether I think online writing classes are worth it!)

Check out Wendy’s free YouTube videos and take her free course. She offers such insightful ways to structure your book and writing better. 

Marion Roach: She is a NY Times former writer and editor. She’s written a few books and offers mostly go-at-your-own-pace courses that may cost anywhere from $297 to thousands of dollars. I read her book, “The Memoir Project,” which as a fast read and only cost a few bucks on Amazon. I recommend reading it if you’re new to writing. 

It was beneficial but focused on more high-level stuff, like, making sure your theme is universal and resonates with the reader, not just you. And don’t tell your entire life story because you’re not a celebrity and no one cares. 

I haven’t taken her course but I sign up whenever she has a webinar. I find her podcast to be pretty awesome—it’s called Qwerty. She interviews accomplished writers and shares tips and advice for how to get your book published. 

Joe Bunting: I found Joe on YouTube but saw him on a free webinar Marion had offered. (I’m sure the memoir publishing world is pretty small.) Joe is a former WSJ journalist who wrote a book called “Crowdsourcing Paris.” I read it and it’s pretty delightful. 

He also offers a course on The Write Practice and has a community of writers who read and send you feedback on your drafts. This is subscription-based and I believe it costs ~ $59 a month to tap into his network of writers. 

I was close to pulling the trigger on Joe’s class because I really wanted to tap into a network of writers to write with, get feedback, give feedback, and learn more about publishing books. I found this Reddit thread that gave me a much better sense of what the subscription entails, and I’m glad I didn’t sign up. 

3 big takeaways from YouTubing

After spending about two weeks diligently researching hours of YouTube videos for how to structure your book, how to write your book, what’s the most important part of writing a book, etc… I learned the following. 

1. You need conflict. What does the main character want? What’s the quest? (Think about every great movie you saw. What did the protagonist do in order to achieve X by the end?)

2. You need mini-conflicts in each scene and chapter. 

3. Scenes and chapters need to drive the story forward, period. 

I’m giving myself a year to write my memoir

Even if it’s my vomit draft, by this time next year, I hope to have a manuscript done. 

In addition to YouTube, I picked up a few books on how to write memoirs, including “Your Life is a Book” and “The Art of Memoir.” Next, I wanted to know more about how to structure my book. What am I supposed to include in Acts 1, 2, and 3? What’s the climax? How will it end? How are chapters interconnected? 

I definitely have not completely figured out how to structure it, but I’m learning a lot in Wendy’s class. In trying to figure this out, I have to write every single day, even if I’m unsure of what I’m doing. 

And most importantly, I’m still reading memoirs all the time. I’m currently enamored with Viola Davis’ “Finding Me.” Hot damn, she is such a badass. 

Authors like Viola give me the hope and the inspiration I need to keep going, to keep writing, and not get too bogged down by the process. The road to authorship is overwhelming, but as with anything that feels too big to accomplish, you just do a little at a time. For now, it’s writing each day and piecing together my draft.

Subscribe if you wanna learn more about what else I did in those first six months!